Nurture the most important relationship you have
There are certain people we can’t imagine living without. Maybe it’s a parent, a spouse or a child. Perhaps it’s a best friend, a neighbor or a favorite aunt who just gets us. These are the relationships that we care about enough to nurture. We place tremendous value on them, and we want to make sure these individuals know much they mean to us. We set aside time for them, treat them with kindness, love with excess and lift them up with our words whenever possible. But, when we make that list of important people in our lives, how often do we...
read moreThe simple lesson of the alchemist
The request was simple. “I need a brown tunic,” my son said matter-of-factly. It was my third and final go-around helping create a character from the Middle Ages, a presentation that marked the culmination of a sixth grade social studies unit. We had cobbled together costumes for a baker and then a breadmaker’s wife when his sisters had completed the same project. Surely there was something around the house that would suffice for his assigned character, an alchemist. I ran through some ideas that involved recycling old Halloween...
read moreSpecial recipes serve up clear connection
My husband looked at me with surprise as I stood before him in tears. “What’s wrong?” he asked. “Your mom died two years ago today, and I used the last of the plastic wrap,” I sputtered. He had been dozing on the couch, and I had woken him to share this information. He was aware of the first fact, not so much the second. “Am I dreaming?” he asked, glancing around the room in confusion. I knew it sounded like a ridiculous thing to cry about, but his mother had given me the giant box of plastic wrap I was referring to. The idea that I had used...
read moreOne simple hop can be the next best step
The scratching sound overhead startled me. I could only think that the animal scampering on the roof was trying to gain access to attic space in our house. It was not something I wanted to deal with today – or any day, for that matter. I scanned the ceiling above me as the odd scratching sound continued, and a moment later a bird gazed through the skylight window. Its head darted about as it hopped, its golden beak wagging with a sense of urgency. I sensed a frantic look in its dark eyes, as if it did not know why it came to be on the roof or...
read moreThe truth about hugs
It had been six weeks, four days, three hours and thirty-odd minutes since I had last hugged my second born. I clung to the memory of that rather fleeting moment in the courtyard just outside her Boston dorm, knowing it would be the longest I had ever gone without being able to hug her at will. Excuses for delaying my departure had run out; her father and brother had said their goodbyes and left hours before. Now, she had a roommate to befriend, people to meet, places to explore. I had a three-plus hour drive back home to my son and husband,...
read moreWhy I choose kindness
The votes have been counted, the victor declared. The election is over. Some mourn, some celebrate. Yet as with any competition, how we behave in the aftermath matters. It’s time to stop with the hatred. It’s time to stop with the divisive language. We will be nothing as a country if we won’t try to find a way to come together to move forward. Maybe that’s being simplistic, maybe it’s viewing this through rose-colored glasses. But please, our children are still watching, and they see how we treat each other in victory and in...
read moreGrateful for the scent of laughter
My son rounded the corner into the laundry room, an impish look on his face. “Mom, does it kind of smell like up-dog in the house?” A flurry of thoughts ran through my brain as I paired socks from the latest clean load, and I asked a seemingly logical question: “What’s up-dog?” “Not much, what’s up with you,” the 11-year-old replied, visibly pleased I had so easily fallen for his joke. I laughed out loud, and it felt good. Today, I am grateful for my son’s sense of humor.
read moreWhat Mom is really saying
“It’s supposed to get to 50 degrees today,” my daughter said as she grabbed her backpack before heading out the door to school. It has been an unusually tame winter, but 50 degrees was almost inconceivable for February in upstate New York. I noticed she was wearing a short-sleeve shirt under her jacket, and questioned her in a way that was interpreted as disapproval. “Mom, I sometimes wear short sleeves even if it’s freezing,” said the 17-year-old as she pulled on shoes, her tone conveying slight annoyance. I nodded. That was true, and as she...
read moreGratitude = Happiness
Check out the New York Times piece, “Choose to Be Grateful. It Will Make You Happier” by New York Times Contributing Op-Ed Writer Arthur C. Brooks writes. Brooks writes: Be honest: When was the last time you were grateful for the spots on a trout? More seriously, think of the small, useless things you experience — the smell of fall in the air, the fragment of a song that reminds you of when you were a kid. Give...
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